The Explanation #26

I do not have a date or precise timeline for most of the things that Brian has done to show us that he goes on. There are many and for a long time, I never thought of compiling them in any way. Some are more profound than others. There are times when it’s a simple hello from where he is, barely perceptible but there – you feel it and your heart goes warm and the corners of your mouth smile knowing he is reaching out and letting you know he hears you talking about him or that he wants to hug you in your moment. Just last week I was having a conversation with someone about him and the lights in the room went crazy for no reason. She looked bewildered and said, “I don’t know what that’s all about.” I just thought to myself, “I do” and smiled.

I wish that I could remember exactly how long after he left that the topic of this post actually happened, if I had to guess it was a year or so. In previous posts, I’ve covered dream visitations. They are one of my favorite ways in which our loved ones reach out to us. It seems to be the easiest way for them and normally, they leave you feeling warm all over. One thing is for certain; you never forget them.

This particular visit wasn’t to me but to his closest friend. I share it for a couple of reasons. One, he did it, I try to honor that. Two, it provides insight as to just how amazing the bond remains and what they can do – what they can show us.

I have struggled greatly with sharing this, with finding the words to do justice to the gravity. As I often do, I have to stop and ask for guidance now and again. You see, this was no “ordinary” dream visit, as if you could call any of them ordinary.

Brian left this world in an auto accident. It was a tragedy passing. Too young, too fast and completely unexpected. There were questions, he was alone, there was torment about what happened, where was he going, etc., etc. I can only suppose that he wanted to provide those answers. The way he did it however was something I can honestly say, I have never heard before.

In this particular connection, Brian was able show his friend all of the events that occurred that night by placing him with him. He was there in the moments leading up to leaving Brian’s home and the walk to his vehicle. He was with Brian in the car experiencing the foggy weather conditions, driving too fast, not seeing the light/road change in time while being unable to handle the maneuver. He was there until the impact before being taken out of the situation. It was as if Brian was able to replay those moments in time and imprint thoughts all while trying to explain and apologize over and over for it happening at all.

It’s completely mind boggling the power and energy that would take to do that. We can argue maybe to approach but it happened. Circumstances that were previously unknown to him but known to me were confirmed. He was able to verify things for me that I questioned. In that, peace was given.

I believe that was the point. It is not as if our loved ones go on and garner perfect wisdom. They are still who they are. Perhaps, and I believe from other experiences, continuing to learn. Still, who they are their core. Still loving us and doing their best to communicate and answer us from where they are. Sitting close to you and hearing you and what you struggle with. Be open to what they show you. It may be small or large. Be ready for anything.